Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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