the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Randomize
