I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize