They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
