Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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