To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
the day after is always just damage control
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
