Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
