my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Randomize
