Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
