It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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