After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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