Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
