Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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