Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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