Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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