everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
