You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
