no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
