Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
