And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
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he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
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I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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