The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
