i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
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