He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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