I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Randomize