Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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