It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Randomize
