PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
