i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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