it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
