Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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