i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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