Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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