I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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