she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
