they need to just BURY HIM!
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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