She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Boobs speak an international language.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
