Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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