If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
