Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
