so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
