Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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