Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize