We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
