i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
i think i have two assholes
even my farts smell like vagina
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
