I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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