Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize