was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
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