yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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