I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
