Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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